Thursday, April 21, 2005

sun vs library

talk about will power!!!!
this exam period has been sunny alll the way thru...and ive been sick for most of it...and i know the reason y! its coz ive been cooped up in one of the numerous libraries that my campus boasts...breathing recycled air which, based on the concentration of bodies in the library and in such close proximity, is probably more CO2...
Meanwhile...outside...the sun is shining, the grass is freen...the naked trees have even decided that they are going to show some decency and go get some 'leaves' to wear...and every single ounce of me that grew up surrounded by trees and nature and hills and flowers...EVEN in the middle of a city....is DYING to go outside.
yet...its been 13days STRAIGHT that ive been here in the morning and left on the last nite....

why? because its my last year and im committed to NOT screwing up! i will graduate and i will be able to tell my kids that i used to spend the nite in a library after hours with the alarms on (...u know how the folks ALWAYS exaggerate their stories frm school:D:D)

anyways...one more...the last one is on SATo and then i officially have to start thinking about what im going to do with my life.
i want to work...make money...live life abit, but then i think eventually i will want to go bk to school and so...when ur done reading this..say a little prayer for me that i am able to make up my mind!

[exam music = FLOETRY!!!!! watch this space for my blog on these FEN-OHM-in-ALL women]

Saturday, April 16, 2005

is there a difference?

in my 4 years at university in CAnada, i have been actively participating in my campus' Black Student's Association, at one point, I was even Vice President.
My campus does not have anything remotely close to an equitable representation of Black's but WE are on campus and I have realised that people know that WE are on campus...and as such, often our actions are scrutinized, mimicked or even taken to be the perfect representation of 'all things black'.
There are many Africans and Caribbeans on campus who are not 'black' but were participant in the events that we put on as a club. there were also many 'black' Africans/ Caribbeans, Afro-Canadians, Afro-Americans etc...who chose not to participate in or associate with those who were involved in such groups.
The one thing that taught me is that there is a choice, and that choice is something that goes past your skin, your ethnicity or nationality...it is a choice that only an individual can make based on their own personal identity and life experience.

i had alluded to in a previous post....there may be a difference being Black of North American descent, of Caribbean descent, or of African descent. In the social hierarchy that is subtly reinforced in an increasingly globalized world, it appears as tho some feel that the African is at the bottom kabisaaa.
Ive had to think about this long and hard on several occassions, and after reading this article, I find myself thinking about it again.

How similar am I as an African to an akata? Are my mannerisms different? Was my upbringing anything similar to theirs, such that it shaped me into a person who can relate in some way, to their experiences?
or are there only IMAGINED and ASSIMILATED similarities??

our histories, which at one point in time were one and the same, followed different paths, yet both were filled with hardships and strengths and amazing achievements and reasons to be proud of who we are. I acknowledge those similarities.
I also acknowledge that to the world, it often does not matter, whether I am Kenyan, Jamaican or an African American. The color of my skin is the same. The prejudices and racist comments are the same. When he sneered at us and called us 'dirty ni&%^rs, it didnt matter that I was African and he was Afro-Canadian.

I wish that what would matter, is that we would all look at each other as human beings, worthy of respect, fair treatment and some digninty. Maybe once we can look past color and ethnicity and embrace the cultures and traditions that have shaped us into the human beings we have become, then maybe the world would be a better place.

...........a tad idealistic i know....im in one of those 'hopeful' moods.

Tuesday, April 12, 2005